Rock Me Amadeus

8.20 LAX nachos with beef. A family of five all wearing baseball hats with maple leaves on them leap in unison to exclaim that they are going to Australia. I choke a black bean into my nasal cavity. 'Rock Me Amadeus' makes me think of simpler days. I have tried to get a decent seat on this flight, but it seems everything is booked out. The great unwashed have finally discovered the internet i guess. I have misplaced half a chocolate bar in my 'laptop'bag, I can't see that ending well. As I write this I am also trying to connect to the free wireless here at LAX without any luck. I suck at this computer stuff... ps Everybody Wang Chung tonight.

Leaving Vancouver

5.50 pm Time on road 6 hours. Almost descending into LAX. 2.5 hours of pressing ass with a fat monster truck afficianado who insists on turning to look out the window which presses his mobile phone, still clearly turned on, into my leg. As I write this he is farting on me, in real time. I can feel it through my trousers which I will now have to burn... Just beyond the horizon of his monster truck t-shirt, and just below the peak of his 'Lock and Load' camouflage hat, I can make out bits of the desert. Think of sitting beside Uranus on a plane. He lifts an empty fruit drink bottle to his lips and spits tobacco slop, completely detroying my reverie.